Misunderstandings are the hardest to accept.
we want the answers to be clear, we want them now.
but that can’t always be the case.
I am soooooooooooo far from perfect.
It’s actually unfair.
I want to be the accepting, understanding person
that you are. But I’m not.
My acts of impulse come from bad places. Like pride,
fear, power. Not love. I do not wish to push away the
things that I love, the people that I love, because those
things and people are what we search so hard to find, we
try to maintain, but sometimes work so little to keep.
My openness is one of the things that I admire/shame myself for.
It has taken me YEARS, and many hardships to get myself to
open up. And many times, it is for me. Not for anyone else..that I do
it. I realize that it may have a negative affect on my reputation,
on how the world views me, but I don’t care. Part of my BEING is to
express and to feel. To hold it in would take away the very thing
that has given me life during my lowest times, which is writing and
I am misunderstood myself. So, I have to learn to understand that others
are misunderstood as well, and may not need or want to be figured out.