“Humility is a virtue”
I have been through a bunch of terrible things in my lifetime, and with that in mind it has caused me to put up a pseudo cockiness that is sometimes looked at by others as not being as humble as I should be.
During the course of my younger teenage and adult years, I faced several instances where I was living in motels and in other people’s empty apartments. To explain how low you feel in that situation is almost impossible, even for someone who writes. I spent several years trying to get myself and keep myself out of a situation like that, so now its like I have this unbelievably bumptious way of approaching things.
Slowly, I am seeing myself change. Not forcefully, just with age I guess. It starts with one person you care about telling you negative things about yourself all of the time. It starts to break down a confidence that is not even really high to begin with. I look at that person, and I say to myself: “This human soul feels special enough to mark me down to a place that is beneath them.” I realize that I do that as well. I am changing.
I am familiar with hope.
Still, remained I am in an unworthy entitlement.
Life owes me 1 million everything’s for my sorrow
And who is to pay besides my lost time?
Grasping for excuses to compare my life
to the unlucky man sleeping on the sidewalk.
Waiting for what others won’t recognize,
my woes are the hardest to overcome
Even while I pout with my mouth full of food
Or while I am on my knees, refusing to offer up
anything but excuses..
and I am healthy enough to
stand up and make my way.
It is difficult not to feel sorry for yourself when dealing with a situation that is hard, sometimes things can feel completely unbearable. But you know what? 99% of the time, it is tolerable and changeable if our attitudes are in the right place. No matter the situation, we all..and I mean ALL..should be appreciative of just one thing and that is life. Even when dealing with a scary situation, we are still left with the opportunity to breathe, smile, eat, love, feel, and impact others once again. There is someone else on this earth who is doing worse than we are, who can be more deserving, or may NEED you more than you need them.